It is estimated that introverts make up approximately 25% to 30% of the population, with the number increasing every year. While having similar patterns of behavior as ambiverts and even extroverts, introverts do have some features pronounced more prominently. Like shyness, for example. Of course, regardless of the basic personality type, every human being is prone to feel shy in response to certain situations and conditions. Still, introverts are the ones who are likely to feel embarrassed and shy in the most basic circumstances. If you consider yourself an introvert and are struggling with the feeling of shyness chasing you at every step, let’s determine the triggers that make you feel uncomfortable and discover how to overcome them to improve your personal life tremendously.
Typical Causes of Shyness
Most studies have shown there are a few core causes of shyness exist. Apart from up to 15% of infants being born prone to becoming introverted, most insecurities come from parenting and the environment a person grows in. Every external factor, be that school, neighborhood, or even culture, shapes a person from the very beginning of their life journey. The most common causes of social condemnation and, as a result, shyness are racial background, excess weight, and various health maladies. All these factors force people to shut down, which inevitably results in reduced quality of life and the impossibility of building healthy social connections. But in contrast to popular belief, it can be cured provided that a person wants to.
Tips and Solutions for Shy People When Looking for a Partner
At the beginning of your journey of improving the quality of your life and overcoming shyness, there’s nothing wrong with starting small. Use those options first that seem the safest for you at the moment. For example:
– Think about online dating and chats
If the main reason for your insecurity is excess weight and you are not yet ready to approach people in person, change the area of search for love. The best option for you would be to consider top 10 BBW dating sites created for overweight individuals who are not only looking for a romantic relationship but also friendships and new social connections. These platforms are the best option because they allow you to find like-minded people regardless of your location. You won’t have to face judgment because the community on these sites comprises people with similar struggles and preferences. And the fact that you’re not forced to communicate with someone immediately in person will allow you to loosen up and find someone special in a relaxed setting. Zero pressure is the main reason why dating sites for BBW and BBM can be a real way out.
– Try accepting invitations you get
If you have some social connections, like colleagues or classmates, and you receive invitations to attend a party or some sort of meeting every now and then, try not to look for excuses for not coming and start accepting them instead. It won’t be easy at first because you must step out of your comfort zone to accept these invitations. But you can expand it by being around people outside of your home and a comfortable social circle in the form of family and closest friends, which will lead to less anxiety, and, therefore, less shyness.
– Visit a bar for singles with a friend
Another option that has repeatedly shown awesome results is visiting local bars where it’s known single people gather. To tame your social anxiety and feel more confident, invite a friend. Alcohol is known for its sedative but also stimulating effects, but only when used moderately. So, grab a friend, order a glass of wine, and look around. You don’t have to meet all the people at the bar the first night and offer to exchange phone numbers. Instead, let it take as long as you need. To begin with, you can get used to visiting places like this and learn to feel comfortable enough to eventually one day join a lonely sitting girl or guy and introduce yourself.
How to Overcome Your Shyness
Along with working on your romantic life, you still have to work through your shyness to feel an improvement in all aspects of your life. In this regard, determination and consistency are key.
– Try to change your mindset step by step
No change is possible until you change your mindset. Remember that, in most cases, we are our own worst enemies. By ignoring our strengths and dwelling on our weaknesses, we worsen our self-esteem and drive ourselves into a hole of instant self-condemnation. In such conditions, personal growth, let alone any other improvement, is impossible. Arm yourself with the psychology and personal development literature that teaches you how to change your mindset. Accept small things: you are not bad conversationalist, you are just shy; you are not fat but you are a big beautiful woman (BBW). You will see how much your life and relationship with yourself will change.
– Go to the gym for positive reinforcement
A healthy mind lives in a healthy body. If your insecurity concerns being overweight and you consider yourself being fat, working on your body is the best way to overcome it. Start going to the gym on a regular basis, and prove to yourself that you can change and be a better version of yourself. In 9 out of 10 cases, overweight people who succeeded in achieving their dream body with regular workouts forgot about their self-consciousness and learned self-love, which is essential if you want your life to improve. This approach can turn your life and your relationships with others upside down.
– Talk to a therapist about your problems
The last but most important decision you can make for your own sake to start living your life to the fullest is to see a therapist. Regardless of what is bothering you and the cause of your insecurities, anxiety, and shyness, you can talk to a highly-trained person who deals with these issues. You can discover them together if you are not aware of the reasons. For better results, choose a psychologist who exclusively works with introverts and go to at least one session. The results won’t be long in coming, and consistent work with a therapist will help you better understand yourself and the people around you and, therefore, help to overcome your shyness.
Regardless of the reasons for your shyness, you have all resources to overcome it and change yourself for the better. It all depends on you, your willingness to change, and your diligence. Don’t be afraid to ask for help from friends and people trained to deal with such issues; they will gladly help you on your way to self-development. And once you start working on yourself and learn how to love yourself unconditionally, love will not keep you waiting.